If you think that being clean-shaven and relatively hairless is sexy, boy, do I have news for you. What I'm about to tell you is going to change your life, so you best prepare yourself, my friend.
Are you ready for this? Good. Let's proceed.
According to an illuminating video by AsapSCIENCE, women are really into woolly dudes they can snuggle up to like they would a warm, fuzzy blanket on a brisk autumn day, so it looks like having a downy chest-rug like Tom Selleck and a big, bushy, luxurious beard like Charles Darwin is what truly gets the ladies hot and bothered. Hell yeah.
This groundbreaking information is nothing new, though. A while ago, we told you that women absolutely dig beards, and that they see hunky dudes with full, sexy beards as perfect potential baby daddies, which means women want to get with all the hairy dudes before anyone else.
But still, it's great to have even more evidence on why all you furry men are super sexy. Check out the video below, or just skip over it and read on, because I'm going to tell you the gist of it anyway.
“All humans have the same number of hair follicles as our primate ancestors, except our hair now is much more thin and unable to be seen by the human eye,” the video says, explaining how we evolved away from our monkey-like furriness to adapt to a more modern lifestyle.
“Throughout evolution it became an advantage to have thinner hair, and it’s thought to be this way because our ancestors were traveling far distances to find food and, in the heat, thick hair was a disadvantage.”
Okay, cool. Good to know as background information.
Fun fact: even though dudes look like they’re a thousand times hairier than women, men and women actually have the same average number of hair follicles, meaning we’re all equally hairy.
What’s different, however, is the type of hair men and women have — men have more of something called ‘terminal’ hair, which is the thick, furry hair that we have on our heads. Dudes have terminal hair all over, like “on their chest, back, and other places,” which is why a lot of dudes have a rug for a chest.
Women, on the other hand, have more of a different type of hair, called ‘vellus’ hair, which is that thin peach-fuzz that you can hardly notice unless you have a magnifying glass. That’s why women look relatively hairless – it’s not that they aren’t hairy, it’s just that we can’t really see it.
And these differences in hair type, my friends, is all thanks to evolutionary sexual selection.
“Men may have become hairier to attract the opposite sex – the hair being an indication of health and fitness,” the video says, alluding to the fact that biologically, hair is a marker of health, vitality, and manliness.
It’s a known fact that testosterone, a.k.a. the manly hormone, is what makes men hairy, so, it’s only natural that higher levels of testosterone lead to more and thicker body hair, as well as a higher sex drive, more energy, and more confidence. And all of that is super hot to the ladies.
Additionally, there’s a related theory that way, WAY back when, men used their body hair to detect if they had parasites or not, and females would be attracted to men who had luscious forests of body hair, which indicated they were healthy and parasite free.
To prove this theory, researcher Michael Siva-Jothy conducted a study that found that when hungry bugs were placed on the arms of shaved, hairless dudes, the bugs were more likely to bite and feed, compared to bugs placed on fleecy, hairy arms. Ew, but cool!
And so, since humans evolve at a glacial pace, and because evolutionary remnants are very real, (most) women find hairier dudes irresistible. Disclaimer: I'm a woman, so I think you can trust me on this.
Finally, here’s one last little nugget of information for you: evidence suggests that there’s a link between hairiness and strength, so the hairier you are, the stronger you are. And women love strong dudes.
Now, in case you're someone who doesn't really have a lot of hair — be it on your body, face, or head — fear not, my dudes, because another study found that bald guys are seen as smart, dominant, and pretty goddamn sexy, and honestly, that's pretty stellar, too.